Our Blog of the Week this week is a tongue in cheek poem by the wonderful Knees Up Mother Brown.
And if you put it like that – who indeed would be a mother?!
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It really should be every mothers right
To shout out loud, parenting is shite!
It’s easy to smile and pretend to the masses
That everything is fine through your rose tinted glasses
From the minute they wake from their blissful slumber
You struggle to keep yourself from going under
The school run is manic, you’re always late
It’s a miracle at all that you reach the school gate
You sigh with relief as they go through the door
A few hours peace before they’re back for more
The fights and the tantrums, no wonder you’re snappy
And try not to cry at another filled nappy
I mean how is it possible to stop feeling glum
When a shout from upstairs says “mum, come wipe my bum”
The coughs, colds, the snot, the poo and the vomit
Chicken pox, head lice, you’ve just got to love it
As you watch them trying to murder each other
You inwardly sigh and think, who’d be a mother
I just wish my kids would stop making that din
It’s really enough to drive me to gin
Your career that you worked so hard to achieve
Seems a distant world, almost make believe
Don’t worry too much as your skill set has changed
We’ll conveniently ignore that you’re now slightly deranged
Your skills that you learn through those first early years
Through the tempers, the tantrums and so many tears
Your CV should say International Peacekeeper
Or failing that, a most excellent zoo keeper
PS: I really do love my children to bits
Despite them being little shits
This poem in no way portrays an accurate picture of my parenting or my children, although aspects of it may be taken from real life. My children are still alive, happy and much loved by their parents 
Read more from Knees up Mother brown over on her blog http://www.kneesupmotherbrown.me/
